Dear darlings,
I have thought through my problems over and over again. I was knocked some sense into my head by Hoang, scolded by him for being a stupid girl; that people don't blame themselves, but should blame others. I guess I am just weired. Blame it on my stubborness that to no avail, I did not listen to any of the advice. Maybe its just against my principals; against what I had been thought.
I was told to talk things out, but given my character, how could I? I always kept things to myself, unable to express it out, and yet now asking me to talk things out? All you will ever hear is the words: "I don't know" and "nevermind". I just find it uneasy and extrememly difficult to say things out that is bothering me.
Slept at 7am this morning, and woke up only at 4pm. I am feeling much better after the whole night of crying. Crying out, really does take away some of your pain. I am just so lost as to what to do, yet I am unwilling to take in any advice I hear. Look at how stubborn am I.
I want to change myself. I want to erase my whole past. I don't want to be Grace anymore. You don't know how tiring and painful it is to be me. I want to be happy! Who doesn't. I want to liv everyday with a smile on my face no matter how hard it is. But, it is easier said than done. Sometimes, I don't understand things anymore. I don't even understand myself anymore.
I have thought through my problems over and over again. I was knocked some sense into my head by Hoang, scolded by him for being a stupid girl; that people don't blame themselves, but should blame others. I guess I am just weired. Blame it on my stubborness that to no avail, I did not listen to any of the advice. Maybe its just against my principals; against what I had been thought.
I was told to talk things out, but given my character, how could I? I always kept things to myself, unable to express it out, and yet now asking me to talk things out? All you will ever hear is the words: "I don't know" and "nevermind". I just find it uneasy and extrememly difficult to say things out that is bothering me.
Slept at 7am this morning, and woke up only at 4pm. I am feeling much better after the whole night of crying. Crying out, really does take away some of your pain. I am just so lost as to what to do, yet I am unwilling to take in any advice I hear. Look at how stubborn am I.
I want to change myself. I want to erase my whole past. I don't want to be Grace anymore. You don't know how tiring and painful it is to be me. I want to be happy! Who doesn't. I want to liv everyday with a smile on my face no matter how hard it is. But, it is easier said than done. Sometimes, I don't understand things anymore. I don't even understand myself anymore.