I'm currently hooked onto Air Supply's "Every women in the world". An old song, but not too old to touch anyone's heart. Apart from having plenty of holidays, life have been the same to me. My weekdays are spent in school, while my weekends are either spent slacking around or just revising my work. Spending my free time reading books after books. Right now, I am reading "Vision in White" by Nora Roberts. Term 2 is almost finishing and GP exams are coming in two weeks time. Time really flies.
Apart from these, I had also been spending plenty of time thinking about life, love and more. Lately, I have been giving up plenty on life even to the point where I don't even care if I will ever live to regret not trying. Partly because I am seriously confused with what I want, what I was looking for; I just wanted to stop pursuing everything altogether. On the contrary, as much as life is so difficult to comprehend, that is the fun of it. All the more you will appreciate life.
Love is very complex, even to the point I am very afraid of it. Honestly, if I were a realistic girl who listens to my mind, that would mean "I don't want to fall in love ever again." Luckily, I am an idealistic one who listens to my heart. Ideal versus reality; the idealistic ones always loses out. Maybe it is because of our impossible fairytale demands? I don't know. However, it takes one to vision and dream for something to come true in reality. It takes time, but not impossible.
I am not afraid to try to love again. In fact, if up till this point I tell myself that I only like him and nothing more than that, then I am definitely in denial. It is because I am afraid to fail, that is why it is better for me to be living in denial. The last thing I ever want is the person whom I love to hurt me. I rather hurt myself. I don't want to be sad or cry because of a guy, ever again.
I have been asking myself this for the past week. "If loving someone is so difficult, would I wait for the one whom I love, or go with the one who loves me?"
And so far my answer would always be, I would wait for the one whom I love. I am such a weirdo right. But come to think of it, why be with someone who you could never fall in love with. What is the point of having someone else's love, when I will never have true happiness.
The question I need to answer now is "Do I dare to take a gamble with my heart?"
Either way, when he is happy, I will be happy for him. I'll be there to catch him when he falls. I'll be there to shower him with encouragements, I'll take all his troubles away...... That is the number 1 rule of Grace's love. Hahas!
Apart from these, I had also been spending plenty of time thinking about life, love and more. Lately, I have been giving up plenty on life even to the point where I don't even care if I will ever live to regret not trying. Partly because I am seriously confused with what I want, what I was looking for; I just wanted to stop pursuing everything altogether. On the contrary, as much as life is so difficult to comprehend, that is the fun of it. All the more you will appreciate life.
Love is very complex, even to the point I am very afraid of it. Honestly, if I were a realistic girl who listens to my mind, that would mean "I don't want to fall in love ever again." Luckily, I am an idealistic one who listens to my heart. Ideal versus reality; the idealistic ones always loses out. Maybe it is because of our impossible fairytale demands? I don't know. However, it takes one to vision and dream for something to come true in reality. It takes time, but not impossible.
I am not afraid to try to love again. In fact, if up till this point I tell myself that I only like him and nothing more than that, then I am definitely in denial. It is because I am afraid to fail, that is why it is better for me to be living in denial. The last thing I ever want is the person whom I love to hurt me. I rather hurt myself. I don't want to be sad or cry because of a guy, ever again.
I have been asking myself this for the past week. "If loving someone is so difficult, would I wait for the one whom I love, or go with the one who loves me?"
And so far my answer would always be, I would wait for the one whom I love. I am such a weirdo right. But come to think of it, why be with someone who you could never fall in love with. What is the point of having someone else's love, when I will never have true happiness.
The question I need to answer now is "Do I dare to take a gamble with my heart?"
Either way, when he is happy, I will be happy for him. I'll be there to catch him when he falls. I'll be there to shower him with encouragements, I'll take all his troubles away...... That is the number 1 rule of Grace's love. Hahas!
